12 Upside-Down New Year’s Resolutions for 2020
I love New Year's Resolutions. Writing down my wide-eyed dreams for the next 365 days gives me great hope. But then, I hate New Year's Resolutions. Because around the middle of April I realize just how pie-in-the-sky they really were. So, ...
How to Communicate When You’re Angry
Have you ever been red-hot mad? So mad you couldn't see straight? We all have. And when we're angry, we tend to do one of three things- attack like a Bulldog, manipulate like a Fox, or withdraw like a Turtle. However, our unhealthy strategies destroy ...
Just Try to Trigger Me
Conversations about controversial subjects can quickly turn violent- both in word and action. It's not easy to keep your cool, stay in the moment, and maintain your connection with the other person. When my progressive, Seattle-dwelling friend Kell ...
After the Midterms
Today, conversations about politics with people on the other side of the aisle from you can be downright dangerous. Some people would advise that we all just stick to the topic of the weather, reminiscent of Henry Higgins' advice to Eliza Dooli ...
The Kavanaugh Crisis
Whenever a political crisis hits our nation, I immediately think of Kellie, my liberal friend in Seattle with whom I founded the Heart Perception Project after the tumultuous presidential election in 2016. I wonder what she's thinking, and I wonder if we ...
Calling Out Racial Bias (Kindly)
Choose wisely. Sometimes we have days, even weeks, to anticipate the choices we will make in a difficult conversation. Other times the opportunity is suddenly before us and we tiptoe trepidatiously into unknown waters. The latter was the setting for K ...
5 Things You Can Say to Your Friend When Tragedy Strikes
When tragedy strikes, you need your friends and neighbors. You need them to hug you, to help you, to be a tangible reminder of what is good and beautiful and right in the world. And when tragedy strikes your friends, I know you want to be there for them, ...
Say it Brave: Wisdom and Faith for Tough Conversations
My new study for small groups, Say it Brave: Wisdom and Faith for Tough Conversations, is finally available on Amazon. But it has been quite a few years in the making. Here's the story behind it... It was the end of a long conference weekend focused o ...
4 Steps to Civil Conversations: Hashing Out the Roy Moore Dilemma on Video
Nearly every day we are confronted with another national situation that fuels polarity. Most recently, it's the sexual misconduct allegations against Roy Moore, the conservative Republican judge in Alabama who is running in a tight race for US Senate. Eve ...
Pink Party Power: Poured Into to Pour Out
As we bring another Breast Cancer Awareness month to a close, I’m remembering… Cindy. Seven years ago, just a few days before my scheduled preventative bilateral mastectomy, a woman I hardly knew named Cindy Kreidel threw me a “Pink Party.” Complete wit ...